Beth Moore said "I was full of bull. . ."

Tuesday night at bible study we watched Beth Moore's study on "Who do you Trust?" My friend, the Beth Moore junkie has the listening CD's AND the Video DVD's of this. Since I am being groomed by my friend to be yet another BM junkie I had listened to this lesson before. But Tuesday night I learned something new and I wanted to share. Here are the main scriptures that Beth shared for the foundation of this lesson:

Isaiah 26:3-4 (NKJV)
You will keep him in perfect peace, Whose mind is stayed on You, Because he trusts in You.

Trust in the LORD forever, For in YAH, the LORD, is everlasting strength.

AND

Deuteronomy 1:28-33 (KJV)

Whither shall we go up? our brethren have discouraged our heart, saying, The people is greater and taller than we; the cities are great and walled up to heaven; and moreover we have seen the sons of the Anakims there. Then I said unto you, Dread not, neither be afraid of them. The LORD your God which goeth before you, he shall fight for you, according to all that he did for you in Egypt before your eyes; And in the wilderness, where thou hast seen how that the LORD thy God bare thee, as a man doth bear his son, in all the way that ye went, until ye came into this place. Yet in this thing ye did not believe the LORD your God, Who went in the way before you, to search you out a place to pitch your tents in, in fire by night, to shew you by what way ye should go, and in a cloud by day.

There are 2 evidences of distrust or unbelief in God. They are an ailing heart and a spewing mind. Beth asked us to take an evaluation of ourselves and identify where our hearts are ailing and our minds are spewing. She said that usually our ailing heart comes from a "secret pain". And examples of a spewing mind are: worry, fear, vain imaginations, anger, and so on. I am sure that there are more ways to spew than that, but these were the few that she named.

Beth asked us to answer some True/False statements. Here they are:

T or F Deep down I don't trust anyone.
T or F I tend to trust anybody.
T or F There is only one person on earth that I really trust.
T or F I don't trust God.
T or F I only trust God.
T or F I trust God in most things.

Then Beth began to comment on each statement. I'm just gonna be real with you here because that's my new thing that I think God has been telling me He wants me do.

I answered True to the first statement. "Deep down I don't trust anyone!" I'm sorry if that offends anyone, especially my friends, but it's true. For many reasons that I won't go into, I approach all relationships with some amount of distrust. That's just me, who I am (at this moment, but God is still working on me). Beth said that, because I answered true, I needed to let God heal me here, or I will develop a cold heart in order to cope with a cold world. Because, lets face it, some people are just not trustworthy, and when you have been betrayed or let down. . .IT HURTS!

I have to ask myself, can God really do a work in and through my life if I have this constant wall built around myself, refuse to trust people, and be real with them? Besides, am I trusting "the wall I built" to keep me protected? It is a wall built by me. . .and if I'm not mistaken the word of God says that my only refuge is in Him. So I definitely have some healing that needs to take place concerning trusting others.

At this point in the lesson I'm thinking. . . I'm with ya, Beth. . . been there, done that. . . I need to let God heal me. . . He is healing me. . . slowly but surely. . . I see Him working.

Then. . . she got down to "true or false, I only trust God." And Beth said, "If your answer was true to I don't trust anyone. . . AND true to I only trust God. . . You are Full of BULL."

And I thought, "Whoa! What did she say??!! She just said, I am Full of BULL!" Now at this point I was shocked and ready to do what Beth tells us to do sometimes. . .Go home and tell God on her. . .

"God, did you hear what she just said to me!! God, can you believe what she just said?"

And in my spirit, before I could even get off that couch and go home, I heard my Lord say, "Yep, I heard her. Did you hear her, Regina? It's true. . .you need to think about it and talk with Me about it. I have some new things to teach you, about yourself, and about Me."

Wow! That is scary, because anytime God speaks He calls me to a crisis of belief, where He expects me to adjust my belief, and OBEY Him. So that I can experience Him.

(learned from Experiencing God by Henry Blackaby)

Today, in my journey of faith, this is where I am. I am experiencing a crisis of belief and I am adjusting my thoughts and beliefs to line up with what God says is really true. I'm not sure yet what it is He is calling me to obey. But I am sure that as I make these adjustements, He will show me where I need to obey Him.

Remember our main scripture Isaiah 26:3-4, and Deuteronomy 1:28-23.

I've got my "secret pain" held out before my Lord, and he is saying, "after all I've done for you. . .you can't trust me with "this THING?" And I am saying, "I want to Lord, oh please help me with my unbelief!"

Blog readers, we've gotta be real. First with God, and then with others. Otherwise the pain that we go through in this life is all in vain. And I just really do not want to go through "this thing" for nothing! Do you? God can turn our ashes into beauty. A beauty far beyond our imagination.

If we are going to trust God like we say we do then there are only two kinds of situations that we can find ourselves in:

1. Situations in which we will see God's goodness immediately. OR

2. Situations in which we will see God's goodness eventually.

Now, sitting here healthy and happy while all is going well in our lives this makes perfect sense and is easy to remember.

So here's the challenge: Remember it when you are in the storm of that secret pain and your heart is broken. Or when God has asked you to just trust him with "that thing" that you just can't figure out how to fix. Or when he has asked you to be real with others about "that thing" that you've been going through so that others may be healed like you have been healed.

At this moment. . .this is where I am. Trying to keep my mind stayed on Him. How about you? Are we up to the challenge?